A Well Formed Outcome

Many goals fail because they are not clearly thought through. The old saying, "Be careful what you ask for, you might just get it" applies. If you have ever been in a situation where you got what you thought you wanted, and found at the end that you were still dissatisfied with the result, going through these questions can help you avoid repeating that mistake.

If you can, find a friend to take you through these questions. This process can be applied to many areas of life and business.

1. State the problem clearly. Knowing the right question is key to getting the correct answer.

2. What do you want?

A. This must be stated in a positive way. (What you want, not what you don’t want.)

B. What will it look like or feel like when you have this result?

C. Is the problem too big to handle at one go? Too small to be worth a concentrated effort?

D. Ask yourself, "What will getting this outcome do for me?"

E. Follow up with "And what will that get for me?" a few times. 3. Where, when, and with whom do you want this? A. Visualize yourself having this result at a specific time, at a specific place and with other specific people as appropriate to the problem.

B. As you imagine yourself having already accomplished the goal, ask yourself if there if there are other areas of your life that accomplishing this goal would interfere with. 4. How will you know when you have what you want? A. How, when and where will you know that your goal has been accomplished? What will you see, feel, hear or taste when this goal is reached?

B. What feedback will you receive when this goal is met? 5. How will getting this outcome affect or improve other aspects of your life? A. Check your gut. Do you feel fully "right" inside about this goal? Are there any parts of you that are second guessing whether it is a good thing to try and meet this goal?

B. Specific Checks:

Direct asking: Any problems you can think of with accomplishing this goal?
If you had this goal before, what stopped you from attaining this goal previously?
Where else in your life might this or a related problem exist? How might THAT change if you get what you want here?
Visualize yourself in the future. You have gotten exactly what you were asking for. How has your life changed? Do you notice anything that might not be as great as you thought it would? Is everyone you want in your life still around and happy?
Imagine that you are other people who are important in your life such as your spouse, relative, your boss or a coworker. As you take these positions, how do you feel about having met this goal?
If any of these checks result in you changing your mind about whether the goal is a good thing for you, refine your goal and return to step 1.

6. What resources do you already have available in other areas of your life that might help you get what you are seeking now? (This includes all kinds of resources, including emotional, educational and financial)

A. What skills do you already have that will help you achieve your goal?

B. Do you need to acquire additional skills as part of reaching the goal?

7. How can you best utilize these resources to get the desired outcome?

8. What are you going to begin to do now, something that will get you closer to your outcome?

A. What are you going to do each day for the next week to reach this outcome?

B. What plan are you going to put in place to make daily progress towards this goal? Often it is helpful to have another person walk you through this exercise. It keeps you from cheating yourself out of the real answers. It’s often easier to be dishonest with yourself than with others.

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Disclaimer: The information on this site (http://www.bpd411.org) is based on personal experiences of the authors and members of our e-mail mailing list. It is NOT meant to replace professional advice or take the place of counseling, therapy or additional personal research.